defeated

Okay Lovely Readers have Y/you ever just felt like nothing is going to go Y/your way?, like everything Y/you do is just an absolute fucking failure?  Well F/friends that is just how I feel today.  I would love to just crawl into some random hole and hide from all the horrors of the world.  I’d like to be a little girl again, hiding behind my mother’s dress.  P/people, I feel helpless and disillusioned, confused and alone.  The only Person that can help me is 1500 miles away, I was so close! all I wanted was one hug, just one fucking hug…  Is that really so much to ask for.  In my mind I know that it wasn’t my fault but that doesn’t make the pain in my heart go away.  The look of hurt in His eyes was almost too much for this little girl to bear.  The tears just keep flowing, I can’t make it stop, I can’t make this feeling go away, I just want to sleep.  I need Him, I need to make Him happy.  I just want Him to feel all the love I have held inside for so long.  So again W/we wait, I pray that I will be in His arms soon, I need this more than I’ve ever needed anything in my entire life.  I WILL get that hug, it WILL happen!  So Gentle Readers I leave You with these words, Hope is not lost, without it W/we have nothing.  This little girl will NOT be defeated so easily!…  Take care of Y/yourselves please.